In a world of challenges and difficulties, who do you count on? That’s right: a guy with a hat. People trust guys with hats. Hats by themselves lend some amount of credence and respectability, but you put a person under the hat and now you’re talkin’. That’s why I support Paco in his Presidential bid.
You may think I’m rambling. You may think I’m a kook. You may be right. But I know what’s important: linkola. No, wait, I mean integrity. And integrity is something Paco’s got in spades. Probably in clubs as well. But not as in he would club me if I don’t voice my support for him—he’s not that kind of guy and the furious blinking I’m currently doing certainly is not Morse code for “Help, he has me trapped in his basement and is threatening to make me watch the entire Battlestar Galactica series (and by that, I mean Galactica 1980). I mean, how could I possibly make that blink series—I don’t even know how to do Morse code parentheses!
So anyhow, vote for Paco and don’t worry about me at all because I’m certainly not in any danger. I mean, who needs two kneecaps anyhow? We have spares for a reason, right?
36 Chambers - The Legendary Journeys: Execution to the max! 
There’s probably a company that will deliver a nice electric scooter (gimpmobile) to the basement. Don’t worry, it only hurts for awhile. If you get Paco at just the right time, he may toss you some Ibuprophen and Tylenol. So settle down and play nice. Keep repeating, “Paco for President! Paco for President!” It takes you mind off the pain.
No, you were right. It’s about the linkola.