Meet Garry Brown, “Special to the Republican.” He is your one stop shop for all of your Venus the golden retriever news! Does Venus like cheesecake? Click to find out!

Oh, and he somehow has an HOF ballot, which is:

News item: Dec. 17 deadline set for Baseball Hall of Fame ballots. I voted for Jeff Bagwell, Craig Biggio, Edgar Martinez, Pedro Martinez, Mike Piazza and Tim Raines.

On the surface, that’s not a horrifically stupid ballot except WHAT THE HELL WHERE IS RANDY JOHNSON?!

Do I need to make the Unit’s case for you? Okay, maybe I do. He’s got 303 wins. #2 all time in strikeouts. 5 Cy Youngs. A perfect game. Another no-hitter on top of that. JAWS calls him the 9th best starter of all time, between Lefty Grove and Greg Maddux. Above Maddux, I might add.  He’s 9th in WAR. The only starter anywhere near him on the leaderboards that isn’t in the Hall of Fame is Roger Clemens, who should be.

“Oh, but maybe he thought the Unit was a slam dunk so he left him off in favor of somebody else?” Yes. He left him off for four blank spots on his ballot. Honestly, even if Randy Johnson sodomized, murdered and ate his entire family, I’m not sure that justifies leaving him off the ballot.

Your move, Larry Rocca. Can you outstupid this ballot?

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